Jul 24 · 2014
baby: w-w-w-
mom: oh my god! it's the baby's first words!
baby: w-wa-wa-wa
mom: water? what? whale?
baby: What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
  • 890
    1. jayle101 reblogged this from tetsup
    2. liveadlibitum reblogged this from meatwhacker
    3. dude-whatthefuck reblogged this from meatwhacker
    4. awecelott reblogged this from meatwhacker
    5. d-a-n-m-a-r-i reblogged this from meatwhacker
    6. lumpy-spaff reblogged this from sweet-plush-rump
    7. a5htag reblogged this from tetsup
    8. writingwithcatears reblogged this from haruka-ga-kita
    9. haruka-ga-kita reblogged this from tetsup
    10. sweet-plush-rump reblogged this from saraswhiteknuckles
    11. mikispade-s reblogged this from yen2k
    12. yen2k reblogged this from tavr0ss
    13. daryls-dirty-underwear reblogged this from idrewacircle-moving
    14. tristanshoard reblogged this from tavr0ss
    15. colressing reblogged this from shadeofnigh
    16. shadeofnigh reblogged this from griffinmcelmore
    17. fts70457rfl reblogged this from newtphobic
    18. griffinmcelmore reblogged this from newtphobic
    19. ex-lesbianpikachu reblogged this from newtphobic
    20. newtphobic reblogged this from newtphobic
    21. jumpstartbitch reblogged this from 70sarcasmandbowties
    22. tavr0ss posted this