the-love-of-snakes

How DARE you like an animal that is not fluffy! I’ll have you know I was EATEN by a snake once and I DIED

the-long-dog

You know my mom’s uncle’s cousin’s grandma’s dry cleaner’s friend’s sister once had a snake that started lying next to her every night to measure her up to eat her. 

the-love-of-snakes

In fact, my grandma’s neighbor’s sister’s best friend’s FATHER was CONSUMED by his PYTHON that STOPPED EATING just so it could make room for a BIG MEAL. Who’s to say your ball PYTHON won’t eat ME?!? I DIED from a ball python eating ME. How dare you like a snake that eats people like me

kaijutegu

I was told in all seriousness once that my “dangerous boa was going to eat me and I should never let him stretch alongside of me because he’s measuring me to see if I fit in his mouth.”

My boa is a sand boa.

He’s ten inches long.